WE SHOULD not be FRIENDS Will Schwalbe Shares His 40+ Year Friendship of Opposites

Will Shwalbe's memoir of a rocky but durable friendship with the muscular, popular jock he met at Yale when they were both tapped to join one of the college's secret societies makes a captivating read of relationships that are quixotic, symbiotic and often problematic.  Shwalbe is an author, editor and publisher who was a scrawny junior at Yale when he and first gets to know Chris Maxey who will go on to become a Navy Seal and founder of an independent, ecological school in the Bahamas.  With self-deprecating candor and warmth, Schwalbe makes a great case for why the two are an odd couple of oil and water that somehow blends into a rewarding, ongoing friendship that survives the test of time without rhyme but for some reason.   Shwalbe, is gay, non-athletic and awkward.  Maxey is a heterosexual hunk with swagger to spare.  Together, they make an outwardly disparate pair. "Friendships like ours proceed largely unchronicled," notes Shwalbe.  Their life paths crossed when tapped into a secret societiesy at Yale.  They became intertwined for reasons that may not be apparent at a glance.  There's plenty to be gleaned from their friendship, one being to give others a chance to get to know you and you them.  Shwalbe admits to being skeptical about Maxey wanting to befriend him and was fearful of his thinking he might be coming onto him.  Maxey concedes to using homophobic slurs and stereotyping gays. "As we shared stories with each other. we were starting to find that our lives had more in common than we could have imagined."  "Shwalbe has a deft writer's gift for charm.   He regales us in fits and starts and despite periods apart, they remained deeply rooted.  It's hard to determine the moment a heart becomes overrun with affection and morphs into love.  I was deeply invested in their individual journeys; Maxey's as a Navy Seal, family man with travails and the founder of a school, and Schwalbe's literary career, travels and finding his longtime partner.  But, what made this read worth celebrating is the simple, yet elegant gospel, how fortunate it is to have formed an unshakeable friendship in life.  "We enjoy one another's company.  We like the people our friends are, and the person we are when we're around them."  

Alice Munroe's Short Story Collection THE MOONS OF JUPITER is Extraordinary

Alice Munro, now age 92, is one of the world's premier short story writers and she shows no signs of slowing down.  In fact, her writing continues to dazzle while still creating innovative curves to the short story structure.  Born in Canada in 1931, Munro sets many of her story in her native country and often weaves her own life into her fiction.  The many prestigious literary awards and honors including the Nobel Prize in Literature (2013), Man Booker Int'l Prize (2009), Nat'l Book Critics Circle Award and the Medal of Honor for Literature.  THE MOONS of JUPITER published in 1982 is a collection of short stories that share themes of regret, disillusionment and forbearance over time.  What unites the stories is their uncanny power of observation on daily life, its inflections and innate emotional responses.   Munro masters a deceivingly simple story with the depth of familiarity she draws for the characters; what they are truly feeling despite what they may or may not be expressing.  Munro gives an elegant clarity to her characters that enables the reader to identify individual personalities and traits.  In the title story, family members assemble around the patriarch as his health is flailing.  There's the gravitational familial ties that circumvent the parent.  The father's doting daughter, Janet, is also coping with the dissension of her daughter which bears the most potency to cause her pain and regret.  Meanwhile, Janet's father awaits an amputation required to save his life despite the inherent risks of surgery.  A constant flux of power dynamics are at play while considering the risks of change and annexation.  Another story focuses on two octogenarians who knew each other as young girls and now find themselves in the same senior center.  Their trajectories took them in different directions once married and with children but they've found themselves situated together as elderly, wheelchair dependent widows.  Imagining these two would become reunited as friends at this stage is premature for their keen disparate personalities which prove self-serving.  We grasp how and why they try to dominate the other and how the two women seek out what they need from other residents.   Another prevalent motif in the collection is the quest for love and its travails.  Munro poses an astute view that traverses the varying stories.  "Love is not kind or honest and does not contribute to happiness in any reliable way."  In the short story, "Labor Day Dinner" there's a vying for one man's affections despite one's noting its futility once possessed. "Setting things up to find failure inhume, railing at him, then getting cold feet and making up.  Gradually the need to get rid of him would build again, but I was always sure it was his fault-if he'd just do this or that I could love him."  THE MOONS of JUPITER is one of Munro's many compelling short story collections to treasure.  

The novel FLIGHTS by Nobel Prize winning author Olga Tokarczuk

Olga Tokarczuk (b. Poland1973) is a Man Booker and Nobel Prize winning author.  FLIGHTS is a fragmentary novel that transcends time, space and oftentimes logic for a complicated, chaotic and unsettling read.  The stories unfolds with a mysterious disappearance of a mother and child. The father is waiting in the car for them to return from what was to be a quick rest stop.  The family was vacationing on a small foreign island.  The father becomes dependent on his landlord for his assistance and translation.  When it becomes more apparent that it would be impossible to have left the island without notice the father becomes a suspect and how things will be resolved remain an unsettling enigma.  The beguiling chapters are all vastly different in subject, time and style.  For many readers the discordance will feel distracting and perhaps troubling in their intent.  For others, searching for a connective tissue present a challenging objective.  Unifying themes of travel, discovery and desire for groundbreaking exploration are tantamount.  This can be found in studies of the human form and its preservations.  "Transforming the human essence into a body and before our eyes undressing it of mystery."  The quest deemed paramount is  the essential need for a continual foray into the unknown, the unexamined by fierecly knocking down barriers.  Ironically, having unearthed the hidden, Tokarczuk condemns its clarifications.  "Description is akin to overuse-it destroys; the colors wear off, the corners lose their definition, and in the end what's been described begins to fade, to disappear."  The author also speaks to being drawn to that which is aberrant.  She's attracted to that which is flawed and defected, mistakes in the making.  "I believe unswervingly, agonizingly, that it is in freaks that Being breaks through to the surface and reveals its true nature."   Interspersed among the book are shorter stories or anecdotes which are noteworthy and yet baffling.  I'm at a loss for deciphering Tokarczuk's theological introspections.  Nevertheless, I found them arresting in their ambiguity.  FLIGHTS is not an easily accessible read.  While never tedious, it's oftentimes trying.   I was captivated most by several of the in depth stories as in the missing wife, and the scientist who visits a preservationist widow hoping to glean secret formulas taken to the grave.  FLIGHTS will elevate some readers onto an uncommon strata while pushing off others.  "What makes us most human is the possession of a unique and irreproducible story, that we take place over time and leave behind traces." 

Oprah and Arthur C Brooks' BOOK How to Attain Happiness

If you're not a self-help genre book seeker, join the club with me.  However, it was hard not to get swept up in the infectious joy emanating from Oprah and Arthur C Brooks when discussing their joint book project entitled BUILD the LIFE YOU WANT: the Art and Science of Getting Happier when appearing on CBS Sunday Morning in September.  Oprah is one of the world's most recognizable and revered people whose parlayed her celebrity and likability into a well-being guru.  Brooks, a prof. at Harvard holds packed classes lecturing on attaining happiness.  Brooks' popular column in the Atlantic on building one's happiness drew Oprah as a fan.  Oprah reached out and suggested they collaborate on a book together which they were pleased to be promoting.  As Oprah says, "Life is better when you share it."  As many people know, if Oprah puts her name or stamp of approval on something it's like winning the lottery.  Although, according to Brooks, neither money, good lucks, fame or power are elements that assure happiness.  My cynicism and curiosity are what drew me to purchasing and reading the book.  This non-repentant cynic found it a somewhat enjoyable, enlightening and empowering read.   I say this honestly but begrudgingly for I had a captious contention for belittling what was sure to be cliched advice.  However, I fond sensible suggestions when dealing with problematic issues within my family.   Many of the topics were not up my ally and then I would find a snippet that felt directed right towards me.  "Go through the day focusing on things outside yourself, resisting judgement, and avoiding anything self-referential." I incorporated purely observational thoughts rather than opinionated and value-based.  This was a gem as a practical suggestion I put into action with positive results.  And, this tidbit also fit for me, "When someone says, 'You are wrong,' respond with "Tell me more."  And, for me, the most constructive framing for my mind-set was redirecting my focus outward and more time spent marveling at the world around me.  Experiencing awe mitigates a self-centered, perspective freeing a person to appreciate and enjoy what life is offering.   Arthur Brooks should be happy that I am endorsing BUILD the LIFE YOU WANT.  While I'm not Oprah, coming from me, that's not too shabby.  And, as you can see, attaining happiness is an on-going, lifetime enterprise.  Although, I don't surmise I'll be deferring to another self-improvement book in the near future.