The mythological story of the Crane Wife can be interpreted as a melancholy love story of love lost from broken expectations. CJ Hauser's essays regarding failed relationships in her 40 years is not ground breaking wisdom but there is a driving voice that should entice a response from mainly female readers. Despite professing ambivalence to whether she finds a partner with whom to have a child, one can't help but note the lament she has for the love she has for the children in her life vanquished with a breakup. "Who is this love for? This never quite-a-step-parent love? I still have it. And I have played my role in these breakups. It is my fault that these little girls are no longer in my life. Still, having my heart broken by little girls is the most confusing pain I have ever felt." It is these revelations of misplaced love and longing that endear Hauser for me. Hauser speaks often and boastfully of the marriage she called off just ten days prior to the wedding and after having purchased a home together. This felt wearisome and disingenuous as she feels brave for not giving into what was expected. However, there are the many years on and off with her ex-fiancee in a relationship she thought she could fix by healing her partner. These were essays of what you might hear from people in co-dependent relationships who would have saved years of heartache had they the epiphany they couldn't change the other's addictive behavior; love does not heal all. Hauser identified herself at the age of twelve as a "hopeless romantic. I have always loved love." It is evident throughout her writings that love has been an epic search and a lifelong partner the pinnacle of her search. Her candor and resolve are both engendering and admirable. Still, there are essays that I found tedious and frivolous. Hauser rambles on about her favorite movie, "The Philadelphia Story," with Hepburn, Grant and Stewart. Hepburn has three suitors and she is to chose from these three archetype men and what their joint lives would mean. Yet, Hauser's love life focused not on the wedding day but the dream house she would occupy. Hauser has a natural way with children as she interviews them for their dream house. The verbatim questions and answers were delightful and I could sense her ease and enjoyment with children. Hauser addresses her sexual attraction to both sexes and the pain of causing another pain in a relationship. Her statement "We have deluded ourselves that a human can be happy living alone with one or two people in this world" gave me pause. And, lastly she speaks warmly of the unqualified love she feels from her father. Their shared passion for gardening was delightful. Hauser teaches creative writing at Colgate University. The self-discovery writing style by Hauser left a lingering affect which I admired but her personal history grew tired.
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